Clad in a frilly shirt and form-fitting white pants, Sean Spicer made his debut on Dancing with the Stars Monday night, where the former White House press secretary took the very last strands of his reputation and set them ablaze in a blinding, neon-green fire.
“What the hell is he wearing?” the internet collectively gasped, as Spicer shimmied and clapped for himself on stage, his clenched and overeager smile making the routine both more unwatchable and impossible to look away from.
“It’s like you were being attacked by a swarm of wasps,” one judge told him.
At one point, the former Trump mouthpiece attempted to address the controversy over his casting. “There’s no question my time in the White House was very tumultuous,” he said in a video introduction, conveniently failing to mention his current employment as a spokesman for a pro-Trump super-PAC. “I think it gave people a very one-dimensional look at who I am as a person.”
In the end, Spicer and teammate Lindsay Arnold could only eke out a disappointing 12 out of 30 score. But that was just the start. Hours after his most recent attempt to distance himself from his identity as the man who repeatedly and outlandishly lied on behalf of the president, Spicer appeared to make the case that his dancing ambitions were part of a wider culture war.
“Clearly the judges aren’t going to be with me,” Spicer wrote in a since-deleted tweet early Tuesday morning. “Let’s send the message to #Hollywood that those of us who stand for #Christ won’t be discounted. May God bless you.”
After drawing a fresh round of humiliation with the post, Spicer later replaced it with a more simple message: