Check Out Kellyanne Conway’s Version of an Apology

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Just to follow up on last night, here is Kellyanne Conway’s apology for telling the nation about the “Bowling Green massacre” on prime time TV last night. It’s a masterpiece:

Just an honest mistake! What she meant to say, apparently, was this:

Two Iraqis came here to this country, were radicalized, and they were the masterminds behind the Bowling Green terrorists.

This makes no sense, of course. The two Iraqis were the masterminds behind the two Iraqis? Please. So here’s Conway’s version of a mea culpa:

  • Tell a tall tale about what she meant to say.
  • Link to a four-year-old story which—if you actually read it—says only that the FBI is conducting “dozens of current counter-terrorism investigations.”
  • Mount a grievance against a reporter who quoted her correctly on the Today show.
  • Compliment herself for her class and grace because she chooses not to bring down her slavering hordes on an editor who did nothing wrong.
  • Pretend that the White House didn’t spend days upon endless days moaning and bellyaching about the MLK Jr. bust story—a story that was corrected in less than half an hour.

Mission accomplished! Millions of people have now heard about the Bowling Green massacre. Conway has, technically, admitted she was wrong, so the media won’t bother following up and virtually no one will hear that no such massacre took place. You’d think that would be victory enough, but just for good measure she then attacked a reporter and told the world what a wonderful, gracious person she is. What a pro.

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